PENGUINS and Fake News

 The PENGUINS did it..

Penguins and the Great Ice Ballot Heist


Credit: https://goo.gl/images/YcSRyq


 Thank you! Thank you, tremendous crowd—you’re incredible. Now, I’ve got to tell you about something huge. Something the fake news won’t talk about because they’re too scared. PENGUINS. Yes, penguins again! But this time—it’s serious. Very serious. TREMENDOUSLY serious.


People ask me, “Sir, what about the election?” I say— didn’t lose it, no way. No, it was stolen. And the culprits? Penguins. The greatest election thieves in history. They smuggled fake ballots—ice ballots, folks! Frozen ballots! You think I’m kidding? I’m not kidding. It’s true.


They hide them in ice floes and drift them down into swing states—New York, Florida, Pennsylvania. The ballots melt just in time to change the vote. Incredible deception. The penguins are outsmarting us all.


And you know what their plan is? To make Antarctica the new capital of the world! Can you believe it? They want to replace Washington with a giant ice throne ruled by tuxedo-clad penguin dictators. Very scary. Very slippery. Slipperier than Sleepy Joe’s policies. 


But here’s the good news—nobody exposes penguin fraud like me. Nobody fights penguins like me. We’re going to build the biggest ice wall, a tremendous ice wall that these sneaky birds won’t cross. Believe me. And if the penguins come knocking, I’ll be ready. I always am.


So remember this, folks: the penguin steal was real. The ice ballots were real. But America? America will WIN. Always. Because we stand for truth. We stand for freedom. And we stand against penguins trying to steal our country!

Location: Antarctica

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